Self Esteem Jerks

Chandragupta all of 18 years was getting frustrated as life on a daily basis was a struggle. He was approaching the time when the fight against Nandas was imminent and he just could not bring himself to strategize and practice warcraft.

Something was definitely remiss though he could not put his finger on it. He just knew vaguely that his life needed an overhaul and was unsure where and when to start. In this state of confusion, he approached his mentor Chanakya.

Chankya understanding his state commented “O Supreme warrior who has defeated the Macedonian Governor Seleuces left behind by Alexander the Great, there dawn a few days when a young man, whether a king or a pauper, does not feel complete and his self image needs repair. To do the procedure there are few things that need to be taken care of.”

“What are these things Gurudev” the wannabe emperor inquired.

“Know my king that you feel full of energy and thrust only when your life is designed around your life’s purpose. Keeping your purpose as life’s center piece is the biggest hallmark of self esteem. In your case, forging the biggest empire that Gangetic plains has ever seen is your life purpose and thus you are lucky to have found it early in your life.”

“However even finding life’s purpose might not be sufficient if you are not careful of maintaining the disciplines of Four Don’ts; two of which are situational and balance two dis-positional (related to our nature).”

After taking a pause the teacher continued,

“On situation side, first is trying to please others. When you do things to win approval, liking or ratification of others you compromise your self esteem as also pleasure of the action itself. Make a rule to do things that please you and try not to let the situation hollow out the juice of your long term choices. Allow others to court you if they want instead of you pandering to them. 

Second situation is about having negative people around. With their critical commentary they tend to sap the meaning and purpose of actions. Also they add drama and conflict to situation unnecessarily deviating you from your purpose. Be ruthless in stamping them out; again and again. You owe it to yourself to have a cheerleading squad around and not a set of nagging oafs.”

“Now my King once you have engineered these two situations you will have multiple occasions to keep your energies intact and your esteem high. However there are two enemies yet, lurking in the closet that need to be guarded against too.

First of this is our conception of normal which decides the width of our living. What we are told is middle path behavior and good to follow is someone else’s opinion. It is incumbent upon us to critically judge and adopt that path which is congruent with our innate tastes. It is a hit and trial method however we cannot allow popular prejudices to color our pictures.

Second is our internal relation with our fears. This is one of the most critical relations because depth of our living depends on how much we listen to our fears. If we keep challenging them and their voices, we keep deepening our lifescape. So when you are on the path of purpose, your self esteem has to be stronger than your strongest fear.”

“So Chnadragupt, life has to be optimized for these two situational and dispositional factors apiece for us to tap into the unlimited reservoir of energy that we are all bestowed with. Your current confusion is owing to neglect of these parameters. Sally forth to conquer your enemy but be careful to not let these disciplines of self esteem slacken or your victories will turn meaningless.” The Acharya concluded.